My Wife Be Having My Shorty!

Sorry for the delay in posting for a while. Pat and his disciples have been after me all this time and I had to hide in some dark part of California, Fontucky (in other words, I stayed home). Anyways the news from the I.E. this week is the revelation that my wife is pregnant! That's right, Rikki is having my baby. I know that it seems as if Rikki and I are always copying Beth. First Beth and Andres get married then we get married. Now they are pregnant and then Rikki gets pregnant. Sorry Beth but you demand to be copied. Of course this is kind of a shock as we were using the trying but not really trying form of birth control that is usually reserved for trailer trash. But when in Rome! I mean why spend thousands of dollars for fertility drugs when all that is really needed is a trailer, some booze, and the empty promise that one is "on the pill," "I'll put the condom on later," or the always classic "I didn't think I could get pregnant." Now rest assured that Rikki and I did not have to succumb to such measures but we do live in Fontana. Although the mayor has assured us that we are no longer "Fontucky, the backwater town" it is still filled with Rednecks and a thousand and one storage centers. So even though I did not chug down a six pack of Naty Light while bedding my wench in the ol' trailer, there is something in the air that allows for abnormal breading rates. No matter what we will hope that our child will be healthy and normal. Thanks for your prayers!